I used to judge myself, for all the things I allowed and accepted, but to judge myself means separation, comparison, polarity, everything which is of the mind where I allowed myself to trap me into cycles of feeding the systems within me.
Within that I fed the mind, my own definitions, constantly giving my power away, in believing that I cannot do more, that I cannot stand up, and that I cannot change.
But yes, I can.
I can stop, I can stand up, I can change.
I used to believe, that with some shortcut, with some cheating I can made it easier for me, that I can do it better of less “pain full“.
But yes, It is pain, to give up everything I know and I believed that it is real, but I understand that I am not able to just drop everything, that this require self stability, self commitment, and within self honesty change.
I see what I have done, what I have allowed, I see within me my delusions which are interlinked on knowledge, but this knowledge I have is simply useless.
The picture I see it is not “nice“.
What has been done is done and therefore any judgment is delusion.
I do not know how long it will take, I do not know what I will have to face, maybe there are something within me hidden and I will find and will be scared, and maybe I will want to hide and maybe I will want to not face myself, but I will continue, and within each fall I will stand up, till I will stand absolutely, and I will face, no matter what my mind will try to tell me.
I let go doubts, I see what needs to be done. Simply said, I am not here to masturbate. I am here to walk the process of real change in this world, with group of people which stand for the principle of equality and oneness, within principle any rule is useless.
Thanks, Juraj
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