Friday, September 30, 2011

Self forgiveness - I forgive to myself - 2

I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that god exists.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that god is something separate from me, something out there, something which gave me life, something which is guiding me, something which want something from me, instead of realizing that no such god exists, I am here as breath as life therefore I give the life to myself.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I have to pray for god, that I have to follow the god as mind construct, instead of realizing that any explanation or idea about the god in this world is just product of the mind and therefore completely fake, I am not the mind, I am here as breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to project the responsibility on " god ", instead of realizing that I am responsible for myself and nobody else is responsible just me.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create idea about the " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to believe that this idea is real.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to act on this idea, instead of realizing that I am not idea, that I am not believe, that I do not have to believe to anything, that I am simply here, as breath as life.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that if sometime I do not generate money that it is my failure, instead of realizing, that it is in such conditions normal to also do not generate the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to judge myself according the generated or not generated money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that it is crucial to generate money now, instead of realizing that I have to follow specific steps for successful generating of money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to start to generate the fear within myself when I generate money, that I will lose those generated money, instead of realizing that I am directive principle and therefore I direct what I will do with those generated money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I do not know what is enough when I generate the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think, that I have to wait on something "external" or put responsibility on something "external" when I want to generate the money, instead of realizing that I direct how much, when and where I will use the money for next generating of money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to fear to use money for generating money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to generate any emotion regarding of how, when and how much money I use for generating the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to not be stable and silent within myself, during the usage of money for generating the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to not be here when I use money for generating the money, instead of realizing, that whenever I am, I am here.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create relationship with the money, instead of realizing, that I am the money as the physical, as one and equal to them.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to believe that something " external' is responsible for my actions, when I am generating the money, instead of realizing that something like believing do not exists, that I am fully responsible how , when and how much money I use for generating the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create emotions like anxiety, verbosity, fear during my action of usage of money for generating the money, instead of realizing that I am always here, that those emotions do not exists, that those emotions are of the mind and I am not the mind therefore I am here , stable as breath as infinite expression of me.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I have to stick to some rule when I generate the money, instead of realizing that such action is also expression of me, also the way how I generate the money is also expression of me, not following the fears, desires, anxiety, terror which are of the mind.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself that I do not allow to myself to express myself when I generate the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to suppress myself when I generate the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to forget that generating the money is also the expression of myself.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that the way how I generate the money, that I have to believe in something, instead of realizing that it is the expression of myself.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to connect and create any emotion like anxiety, stress, fear, to the way how I generate the money, instead of realizing that it is my pure expression, as me, as here as breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create the idea of god as money , instead of realizing that it is just separation of the mind from myself as physical, and I am here as breath as equal and one as everything in existence, therefore as money as physical also, not as perception of the mankind.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that I can be scared by something, instead of realizing, that I am here as breath equal and one, therefore something like to be scared is statement of the mind, I am not the mind therefore I cannot be scared, as I cannot scare myself.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that Satan exists, as polarity to god, as god as good and Satan as bad, instead of realizing that god and Satan are just information/knowledge/imagination of the mind as also good/bad as imagination as mind and polarity friction of the mind, and I am not the mind, I am here as breath as equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that devil/Satan exists, or that it is synonym for bad things, instead of realizing that nothing like stand/devil/god exists, all are such imagination of the mind and I am not the mind, I am here as breath , equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that something like heaven or hell exists, instead of realizing that it is simply polarity friction of the mind, and I am not the mind, I am here as life.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that I do not know how to share energy with my body, how to work with energy accumulated in my body, and how to give energy back to the body, to each cell, as equal and one as me as breath here.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to believe in pictures.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to create the picture of myself, instead of realizing, that I am not the picture, as I am here as breath as one and equal.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to create the relationships between the dots and with such creating the picture instead of realizing that I am not the dots, I am not the picture, and I am not the relationship.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted myself as a picture, instead of realizing that I am not the picture, I am not the shape, I am not the color.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to live according the shapes, colors, pictures.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself as color, as shape, as picture, instead of realizing that those are of the mind, and I am not the mind, I am here as breath as life.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to put the value on pictures, to put value on shapes and colors, instead or realizing that I am here equal and one, all pictures, all shapes, all colors are also equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that tiredness exists, instead of realizing, that only mind can be tire and I am not the mind, I am here as breath.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to feed the tiredness of the mind.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to believe that tiredness is real, instead of realizing that this is of the mind and I am not the mind, I am here as life, equal and one to all.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to believe that my hands can be tired.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that my body can be tired, instead of realizing that my body just need rest, nothing more or less.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that I am three dimensional, instead of realizing, that such statement is statement of the mind, and I am not the mind, I am here as life as one as equal to all, therefore I am not dimensional, I am here.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to fear to be self honest.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to fear to be myself.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to fear to give up what's not real within me.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to do not stand up for myself absolute in each breath.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to judge myself for what I allowed and accepted.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to judge myself for who I am.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to fear who I am.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to fear what happened to me when only I am.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to fear to be who I really am.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself that light exists.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that light is real.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself that I am defined by the light.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to create and believe the definitions about me, about myself, instead of realizing that I am here as breath as life, equal and one with all existence but not defined by this existence, not defined by any thought, any idea, any fear, any believe, any emotion, any movement, simple I am not defined by anything.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to define sound.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to define myself according the sound of the mind, instead of realizing that I am not defined by sound of the mind, I am not the sound of the mind, I am not resonance as sound of the mind, I am here as self, as breath, equal  and one as all.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to create the polarity friction as judgment as sound of the mind as judgment as good and bad sound, instead of realizing, that something like good and bad sound simply do not exist, that it is just sound of the mind, perceptions of the mind and understanding of the mind what sound is, and I am not sound of the mind in anyway whatsoever, as I am here as breath, equal and one with all as one.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to desire to get back my money from gambling machine, and judging the person sitting nearby me, when I played and lost all money, and thinking that it is his responsibility for my lose, instead of realizing, that it was not my money, it was money as physical as me, equal and one, and my responsibility for outcome which was lose, because I was hearing somebody else and not myself, and thus greed has been activated within me, fear of lose and self pity. Self judgment for created lose and self comparison and judgment of person sitting nearby me, and with such judgment I judge myself. No more judgment, as I am here, as life, equal and one with all creation.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Self forgiveness - I forgive to myself

I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because of some reason within me.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I defined myself according smoking.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I define it as free will.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to defend my right to smoke.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I believed my mind that smoking is heavenly.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to socialize with " others " through smoking.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to be perceived as free " person ".
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to fit into society according smoking.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to be perceived as person who has money because I smoke one of the " most popular and expensive " cigarettes.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I perceive it as “heavenly " after I eat something or after the sex.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to build my personality based on smoking.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I defined myself as something special when I smoke exact blend of cigarettes.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to be accepted by others as I perceived smokers as more open people.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I "love " the taste of smoke from cigarettes.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I connect the smoking with " special " places.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I connected smoking with my stability.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke because I wanted to prove to the others that I can breathe the smoke to my lungs.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke to avoid making fun from myself by "others" that I do not breathe the smoke to my lungs when I smoked.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to smoke to defend myself from making fun by " others " that I smoked only to my mouth.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I can get money from casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am subject to casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I can consistently generate money in casino instead of realizing that consistency cannot be sustainable in casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need to generate money through casino instead of realizing, that another ways are available for generating the money to support myself and others in need.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that it is possible to generate money through casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to get my power back to mind and participate in mind in casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am less than if I spent money in casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to act based on thoughts, instead of realizing that I am not thoughts.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to believe that casino is the way how to generate the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need to generate the money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not stand for myself instead following the mind, I am not the mind, I am breath, equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to want to return to casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to desire to go back to casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to push myself to go to casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not stand for myself and for life.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to define myself according to casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to believe in casino instead of realizing that it is simply another religion system.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create my own gods in my mind and followed them.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create my own believes and definitions and followed them.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create my own secrets and tried to keep them hidden.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to follow what my mind showed me, instead of realizing that I am not the mind, I am life, equal and one to all.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to define me according the amount of money which I lost in casino.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to visit the casino, instead of realizing that with such act I am visiting the chamber of prayers, another believe system.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to want to excuse the visiting of casino with the money I generated.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to hope that I can generate the money consistently in casino, instead of realizing that money are simply fake.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to give my power to my mind to direct me to casino, instead of realizing, that I am the directive principle, I direct, I am.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to go to casino every day, justify this visits and make from visiting casino my own behavior, instead of realizing, that with such act I am deliberately deceiving myself, giving my power to the systems and giving myself for granted to the " hands" of systems.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to believe that any god exists.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create from casino my own god.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not use the money for those which are in need of money.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not use money effectively and support the systems, instead of realizing that I am life, I am here , and I direct the usage of money to support myself and support life.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to keep the casino as the memory within myself as the chamber of god, instead of realizing, that I am not the memory, and I am not defined by the memories within me, I release them and no more visiting of casino. I am here, I am life.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am some think more if I do not have university degree but I have job where all another are with degree.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to judge people witch go to university.
I forgive to myself that I allowed and accepted to myself to think that I need to contact "Bernard" or "Sunnite" if I want to go to desteni farm, instead of realizing that wherever I am, I am here, as breath, equal and one to all.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think, that if I want to move or go somewhere, that I need also move my body, instead of realizing
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am limited, instead of realizing that what is limited is mind, not me.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I can delude myself, instead of realizing that deception no more exist within me, I am here, as breath, as life, as all, equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that if I fall that I am something less then instead of realizing that falling shows me how I can stand, here, one , equal to all.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to wait on "god".
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create idea about the " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that this idea and believe about the "god" exists.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to worship the " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am less than the " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need the " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am not one and equal to myself as god.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself that I am eternally enslaved to idea of " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to believe in knowledge and information about the " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am here because " god " wanted from me to be here, instead of realizing that I am here, one and equal to all, as life, as breath, as god.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I must suffer for " god "
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that " god " left me here, instead of realizing that I am here, equal and one with all existence, but not defined by the existence.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need consciousness systems and accepted way of living for this system.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need to " prepare " the way for "god " coming, instead of realizing that this was just separation within myself and idea and believe within myself.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to live as locked living expression of " who I am" as system.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need to live as locked expression to worship the " god " and be worthy for him instead of realizing that I am here, as life, as one, equal to all, and nothing like worshiping, following, more then or less then exists.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to limit myself.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to limit myself towards something which looks external.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I am limited.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that limitation exists.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to feed the limitation within me, instead of realizing that only mind can be limited, and I am not the mind therefore I am not limited.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to become the limitation of the mind instead of realizing, that with such act I am giving myself for granted to limitation system of the mind and I am not the mind, I am here in every breath, equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to live as limitation of the mind, instead of realizing that I am not the mind therefore I am not limited, I am here as breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that limitation is necessary for living, instead of realizing that the mind needs the limitation, I am not the mind.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to move within gridline structure, instead of realizing, that I am not limited to the gridline structure and therefore I can move any direction as I am life, here, equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to perceive the grid line structure as my limitation, instead of realizing that I am not limited, therefore I can move where ever I want, as I am equal and one to anything in existence.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to compare myself with others in process, instead of realizing, that I walk my process alone, as others walk their process alone, and I cannot compare myself and my process with others, as I created my own shits and they also, therefore our processes could be different, different points needs to be released, and that's it. I am here, as breath, as life in every moment.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I can be tired.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that tiredness exists.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to define myself as tiredness, instead of realizing, that tired can be only mind, and I am not the mind, I am here, as breath, as life , equal and one.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I can feel tiredness, that I can feel to be tired, instead of realizing that I cannot be tired as life as breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to perceive that if my body need rest that I am tired, instead of realizing that simply my body need rest, but I am not tired as tiredness do not exist, it is only product of the mind and I am not the mind.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that my perception of necessity for resting of my body is my tiredness, instead of realizing that it is the mind which is tired, not myself, I am here as life as breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that breathing can be hard, instead of realizing, that I am the breath as life, here.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that when my body need rest and sleep, that I also need to sleep and not to be aware of myself, instead of realizing, that only the mind need sleep, not me, as I am here as life as breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to not be aware of myself when my body sleep or rest.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not be awake when my body sleep.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to fall to sleep and not be aware of myself, instead of realizing, that mind need to sleep and regenerate itself, I am not the mind therefore I do not need to fall to sleep and I do not need to do not be aware of myself during the sleeping.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not wake up from the bed immediately in one breath.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to snooze when I wake up.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think when I wake up instead of realizing, that with such act, mind is activated and trying to lead me and direct me during the day, I am here as life as breath and I am the directive principle.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think that I need to sleep, instead of realizing that only my body needs to rest, therefore sleep but I can be aware during resting of my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to think and participate in the mind with statement that I need to sleep, instead of realizing that it is polarity friction of the mind, and I am not the mind, I am here as breath as life equal and one to all.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself do not notice my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself do not care about my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to create distance from my body, instead of realizing that I am here as breathe as physical body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not touch my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not hear my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not love my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not accept my body, instead of realizing that I am here, as breath as my body, here.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not enjoy my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to judge my body according the skiing of my body, according the spots on my body, instead of realizing, that
I am here as breath as my body therefore no judgments about my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not be intimate with my body in each breath as I am here.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to separate myself from my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not be aware of my body parts, as legs, hands, head, and body whole as one and equal to all.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not move within my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not explore my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not like my body.
I forgive to myself that I accepted and allowed to myself to do not be equal and one with my body.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Self forgiveness – why self?

                If I experience/experienced some judgment/emotion/thought/perception/sense/fear/etc, thus it means I created it. For whatever reason, for whatever point, it is me who created this experience, it is me who allowed and accepted this.

                People have tendency to misplace their own experiences and project and blame some external person/point for that what they experience. It is not so.

                If I fear something, it is me who is creating this experience and this fear, because for example:

As I was young I was bitten by wasp, and it hurts, I didn’t like that experience of pain, I was bitten also another time to my tongue, when I ate some fruit, and this experience of pain was really bad, and there was some another places in time and space when some wasp bite me. Each time I was aware that it is nothing crucial and I will be ok, but as this experience repeated over and over, I started to charge this experience as negative and connect to this small being “ not likeness “ and judge this being as bad or useless or and I started to create within me fear towards small being, called wasp.

And this being is many times smaller than me, and I can smash and kill this being and by curiosity, it is me who feared this and not the wasp. Wasp cannot do me anything at all, except of some experience of pain which will my body cure in few days. When I saw the wasp, the picture of this triggered automatic reaction in my body to run away, or to move out from the presence of the wasp. Strange, how irrational this is.

So, who was the one responsible for created fear? The small wasp which I see flying around, or me through my past experiences?  Obviously, it was me. Only me,  nothing else.

That’s why self – forgiveness, because each experience I/we have, I/we are responsible.

And self forgiveness, it is just tool, how to release oneself from accepted and allowed behavior, judgment, emotion, how to free self from the never ending cycles of imprisonment in judgments, fears, ups/downs, reactions, imagination, living in the past and in the future, to became the living being which live here, as life not bounded by anything.

Thanks, Juraj

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Self forgiveness

                Firstly I understood forgiveness from religion concept that something wrong had to happen and than it could be forgiven. If I do something wrong than I ask for forgiveness or I forgive to someone.

                But let’s have a look, if nothing wrong/bad exists and nothing good/right exists from polarity point of view, how than I could do something bad or judge myself as bad if it is just my perception, my judgment, and therefore my own created sense of sin or guilt ? And ask for forgiveness?

                How can I forgive someone else, if the behavior of others is based on their own judgments and has nothing to do with me?

                But if I look on this from perspective of self forgiveness, it is different. Bernard was/is/will be right about this point, that self forgiveness is procrastinated, avoided, laughed on, avoided, denied, etc.

                Because, self forgiveness has really nothing to do with any concept which humanity created, especially nothing with any religion.

                Firstly, I really didn’t understand at all why I should forgive to me anything, I thought I am fine. I was not. I started to use self forgiveness, I started to write, I started to speak, and mostly I experienced huge tiredness, immense that I was hardly able to hold myself awake or move the body or do anything, I simply had to rest. Effect of the mind, where through self forgiveness mind is “ hacked  “ .

                I mostly wrote the self forgiveness points and sometimes I spoke it, I see that to do it as combination - write it and then speak it is more effective.

                I went through the points Bernard mentioned in the book, mostly in my case it was procrastination with self forgiveness, avoiding it, or wanting to hold to some specific point and not to let it go, or not doing self forgiveness complete, or even abuse it, or condition my self forgiveness, or use it only on things within me which I didn’t liked and not on things I liked, or forgive only specific thoughts and some remained as part of me.

                Interesting if one comes to the point, to forgive oneself, and let it go as the past which is not here. Most effective I was in regards of my emotions, things which I judged within me and things which I really didn’t liked to experience as anxiety, fear, imagination, sexuality, perception of my body, thoughts and judgments, with breathing also, of course.

                Still I see, many more points will come, as I am aware which points within me I was not able to transcend and I am still holding into, also I am aware what I was able to change.

                I have to say, as I slowed down, how my daily experiences, moments, reactions, thoughts, etc, started to changing and stopping, I started to see differently people around me, my environment and firstly, I started to see differently me.

                Mainly, my experiences, the calmness which started to enter into my life, rush and energy is fading away, slowly and surely my inner peace started to enter into my life, and still, I am saying, I am far from the point where my inner peace will be wholeness as silence as me.

                Once I look on my life, this is the way which is really worth, self forgiveness is the way one can open the door for inner peace to enter into one’s life, to open the door for real self to stand and let go the fake personalities.

                In last period, I wrote lot of SF points, I didn’t publish it, why not? I thought to me that anyway no one is reading my SF, or no one is interested, or no one care, this point comes from my childhood when I experienced myself as alone where no one care about me.

                But anyway, if this will help someone, or if my SF will be inspiration for someone to step forward and try for himself/herself and utilize it, it will be cool.

                So I will publish my SF points, of course those which are written.  J

                Enjoy, thanks, Juraj