Lot of times, I do not noticed I
acted on fear, or spoke within and through fear, or I even do not noticed I lived
and live in fear, or I misplaced anxiety for hunger, or various energy
experiences as cool and worth to live, but by paradox, everything energy based
has one platform – Fear.
I was born into a fear and I became
the fear and I thought myself that this fear is what makes me alive. I became
blind towards my own fears and I stop recognized over time in my life, that
everything I do is back-up as fear within me, as energy and my self definition
to this energy, when I even was not able to see that it is simply fear.
In my life, I manipulated in absolute
blindness of me towards events and situations, where I experienced fear and was
not able to see it is fear, fears from past, fears projected into a future,
lived bound and enslaved in my own creation of fear, in polarity of mind, in
constant turmoil of myself, of torture with fear, towards everything and
everybody, and over time, I even start to give up my fears, as this fears I started
to call life.
It is time to realize for
everybody, that fear do not serve us for nothing, that fear is deception of
ourselves we live in, it is time to see beyond and stop to live the fears, as
it is no living, but slow dying, and slow killing inn front of our own
creation, of our own assassin – called Fear.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to define
myself towards two points within me as polarity of the mind, where I split myself
into two parts, two separated points as superiority/inferiority, good/bad,
beauty/ugly and define myself towards this points and imprison myself in self
definition towards this points through competing, desires, need and wants as
manifested desires to live myself and live my life, to define myself as who I
am according two separated points and live in constant turmoil of myself
between good and bad, superior and inferior, less then and more then, where I
allowed to live in friction of myself as thus generate energy within and as me
and think and believe that this energy experiences are experiences of myself,
that this energy is what I need, that this energy as a friction created within
me is me living me, instead of realizing that simply I lived and live as a
system, as a robot, as a death shadow of memories I lived in fear, and thus
project my fears into a future, into myself and live bound and enslaved in my
own fear, in my own prison I created for myself where I thought and believed
that this prison is all what I am, that I need this prison to enslave me, to
fear to break through the prison of my own fears and stand up within and as me
, to stand up absolute and live me, value me as a life, as the only value which
exist in existence, and thus value existence as me, as equal and one, as life,
as breath as who I am as living being here on earth.
I forgive to myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to think
and believe that thanks the fear I will be able to live and move myself
accordingly within this world, instead of seeing and realizing that fear
enslave, control, and manipulate and that I lived and live in constant control,
manipulation of myself and enslavement of myself through allowance of living in
fear as energy experience where I think and believe that this energy is me
living me, where I defined myself towards energy as fear, where I placed myself
as a slave of the fear and slave of the mind just for the sake of generating
the energy as fear, and to move myself, to speak myself, to voice myself only
in and as a fear as my own prison of me, where I do not allowed and accepted to
myself to free myself and unlock myself form my own fear, anxieties and anger
and nervousness.
I forgive to
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to think and believe that
fear as a energy is that what moves me, what makes me to progress and what
makes me to live, instead of seeing and realizing that within this I did not
moved myself, that I did not expanded myself, that I did not lived myself but
just a program and script as a fear, as a energy I became addicted onto, and
thus I fear to give up my own absolute addiction, which is living in and as
fear.
I forgive to
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to became addict on fear,
became just a reflection or my past fears and living zombie as fear, as my own
prison and my own judgment of me, where I do not allowed and accepted to myself
to free myself and liberate myself from my own prison of the mind, of energy
and thoughts, believes, projections, ideas and simply live here, equal and one
with me body, as breath, as living being honoring life, honoring each moment as
only one moment is real and only one moments exist as all as existence as me.
I forgive to
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to think and believe that I
can not exist without fear, that I cannot free myself, that I am too week and
to scared to unlock my potential, to unlock the life and free life as who I am,
to make myself free from bounds of living in the past.
I forgive to
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to think and believe that I
can selectively decide what I will live and how, instead of taking self
responsibility for myself, to stand up within and as me, in me, as all as one
and take absolute responsibility for myself, take absolute stand within and as
me, to do not allowing and accepting anything less than life, as only life is
only value which exist and thus life can’t be raped, can’t be laughed on,
abused and killed, as only life is what I am thus I have to take stand within
and as me and live life as me, to accept life as me, to live me as me as who I
am as life, as breath here.
Thanks,
Juraj
