Next point as fear I am facing,
is fear of change, I see lot of times I denied this fear or was not aware that
this energy experience is this specific fear, interestingly it is here right
after fear of unknown, thus fears by itself as quite interlinked.
Why I fear to change? This is
quite interesting because I am aware that I can change and I proved to myself within
lot of points that I changed thus those changes was beneficial, it was not “tragedy”
to push myself and simply let go.
Here this fear is linked on very
specific issue as postponement, procrastination, laziness, thus energy polarity
of positive and negative together with my working on my 8th
assignment, I am lax, I do not want to go into specificity of the points I am
working on, I resist to go to really very details of it, I am aware I can do
it, but I do not want.
I built up within me quite
strong resist to go really to very specific details within self forgiveness, as
I see that within this I’ll change and I am not aware who I will be.
It is ego point, where I see
that within this I will have to push myself and stop and let go part of my
personality/character as energy play out of positive/negative through
postponement, procrastination, laziness, not wanting to work on that into
details as perfection and thus resist to work on myself, look and see within me
where and how I can work with me to release myself from patterns which serve me
for nothing, but from certain perspective I like it as this brought me this
illusion of security within my mind creation of this persona/character.
Why to fear to change the points
I am facing? Why to fear to work really with discipline and self-commitment,
why to fear something, as this fear by itself is just illusion? Why to fear as
this fear is just energy produced and stored within me, thus why not to release
myself from this energy? It would be maybe the coolest thing I can do for
myself.
Did I created even likeness
towards fear as energy experience within me? Did I like to fear? Did I like to
remain trapped within illusions of mind as mind by itself is illusion, thus
fuck the fear is bigger illusion than the mind. Can be some illusion bigger and
some smaller? Depends, as I see, how much I defined myself into it, became one
with that illusion, and thus live that illusion. Thus who I am?
Illusion. Thus stop it , get rid
of it, and became real. Living in fear is not real living, it is just
character, mirage, it is not who I really am as I am life here.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to fear to change.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to fear to change as fear of
who I will be when I will change.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to fear to step out of fearful
persona/character of change.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to think and believe that
energy experience as fear of change is real experience of me, and thus feeding
my mind to keep me trapped within my own creation as fear of change.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to do not allow to myself to
work on self forgiveness into details and ensure that I am satisfied with my
self forgiveness as point of my self perfection.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to fear to change and change
into perfection.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to fear to be disciplined within
my application of self forgiveness.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to feat to change the
persona/character as fear of change as I created likeness towards energy
experience of the mind as fear not realizing that within this very allowance
and acceptance I am remaining trapped within and as illusion of the mind as
fear.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to limit myself with energy experience
as fear of change and fear of unknown and thus do not apply self forgiveness
into details as I see and realize that I can do it.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to limit my writings and my
self forgiveness within and as fear of change and thus allowing within me back
doors why I can step back and remain as character/persona living in my mind not
realizing that within this I am allowing and accepting self sabotage of my
process and my walking of my application and my standing up and thus compromise
myself and within this compromise others.
I forgive
myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to live and became fear of
change character and persona and through this energy experience and likeness of
this energy not considering others, their time, their application and thus
postponing and procrastinating that what I can simply do thus I forgive myself
that I have allowed and accepted to myself to create within me resistance to
apply self forgiveness into specificity and details as open back door within me
and excuse why I can remain trapped within and as mind and thus compromise my
application of self forgiveness and through this compromise others and just prolonging
my process instead of simply standing up, be with and as breath here and do
what I have to do which I see and realize I have to work on as and within my
application and walking and thus I forgive myself that I have allowed and
accepted to myself to compromise my standing for life and through this giving
power to my mind to keep me trapped within illusion of fear and thus giving my
mind power to distract and abuse, instead of realizing that life is the only
value.
Thanks,
Juraj
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