Many times I have been solving
within me the points related to my sexuality, and interestingly the definition
of sex, sexuality, or sexual desires, projections, was and is intertwined with
many other points, in meaning, how I see myself as a male and how I see
females, how I experienced sex and sexual events I lived, and thus how I
shaped, molded and defined myself as a male and the experiences of me.
The starting point and thus
creation point within me of sexuality and energy coming from this point is
based on perception of female pelvic area, lower stomach area, basement of the
legs in and as joints connected in pelvis, and perception of the area between
upper thighs and thus area of vagina and thus this picture of female lower/mid
part of body.
The desire to explore and have a
sex with woman comes from point of wanting to explore and get what females keep
hidden, and thus want to get to a point of uncover that what is hidden in front
of my eyes, and also as a point of want to achieve this part of female body as
a highest goal for satisfaction of myself, in and as sex, sexuality and
fulfillment of myself through sex, and thus definition of myself and
fulfillment of myself through sex and getting that what is sometimes hard to
achieve.
Thus desire of sex became
created by me, within me as wanting to achieve that what is hidden in front of
me, that I perceive that this is hidden and that women hide this part of their
body, desire to get to this part of female body and be able to explore this, as
hope of getting to this point and at the same time fear that I will not achieve
this or will not get permission from female to explore her body and this area
of her body, where I connected within me to this point or female body sexual
fantasies, projections, ideas, believes, hope, desire and self fulfillment as
experiencing the energy within me by ability to get permission from female to
explore her body.
From this comes perception of
female body, as unequal connections created within me as perception of specific
part of female, as picture representation where to the pelvic area I connected
the highest priority, than this goes through female buttocks, legs, how female
moves, breasts, neck, lips, ears, and the projections what can be done with all
this parts of female body as energy connections to touches of female body and
thus energy experiences of touch created within me towards this points, and
thus accepted energy experiences and definitions of sex and sexuality by and
through pictures and energy connections to touch based on unequal perception of
female body, where some part has more value and some parts less value, and by
this generate the friction within and as me as polarity of more and less and
thus living as mind design of less/more, where the creation of energy within me
is ensured and thus kept mind “alive”.
Within this the inferiority /
superiority took place, as perception of myself based on points and
achievements I was able to “achieve” with female, as a perception and look of –
how far I am able to get with female in relation of my body and her body, and
what is perceived within me as highest “goal“.
By this I created and shaped and
molded myself as the approach characters towards females, based on fear where
fear have been perceived as love and separation of myself from female and thus
perceiving female as not myself and not equal to myself, where based on amount
of fear generated towards female I shaped my approach and my speech and
utilized the characters for getting to the point of achieve the “goal” and
achieve the prize therefore to be a “winner” as the one who get to a point of
that which I perceived within me as highest “prize” and “goal” as getting the
permission from female to explore her
body to a point of being able to explore, experience the touches of female
pelvic area with anything I am able to, as fingers, penis, lips, tongue where
different energy play outs took place and by this create the friction as
superior / inferior, more / less, like / do not like and thus exist as mind
designs and mind slave of energy as energy addict.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to define sex and define sexuality.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to define myself as sexuality and sexual
expression through and as pictures.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to positively charge word sex, separate myself
from word sex and exist within and as separation from word sex and as mind
judgment of word sex as positive.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I have to define sex
and define sexuality and by this create within me the idea and believe about
sex and what sex should be or how I should experience myself.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to create within me desires related to sex and
sexuality as self definitions about sex and what sex should be.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that sex is about energy
experiences and energy release from my body, not seeing and realizing that
sexual energy is created actually as fear, anger and anxiety.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to separate myself from females and thus see
myself as male as separated entity from females and thus see myself through definitions
about sex and sexuality, as perception of my body as male and perception of
female body.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that if I want to have sex
with female I have to make this, that I have to be one who start to speak about
sex, that I have to be one who show the female that I like her and want her,
and by this live out myself as definitions about sex and what sex should be as
energetic experiences within me.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I as male have to
prove to female that I am good partner for her, that she will allow to have sex
with me and accept me as partner for sex.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I have to be always
the one who is starting the sexual points to speak, express and show.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I as a male have
always get female and her attention and prove her that I am good for her to
have sex with me, and thus exist within and as mind believe about myself and
polarity of the mind as good / bad.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to shape, mold, and define myself according
definitions about sex, projections about sex, energetic charges I put into a
pictures and from this generate energy, desire to want to see this pictures and
want to get this pictures.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to base sex and sexuality on pictures and see
sex through pictures and my experiences as energy movements by these
definitions I placed towards these pictures.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I have to see naked
females and that I need to see naked females and that I desire to see naked
females.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to define female body and charge female body
with sexual energy and by this create within and as me to want to see, touch
and experience female body and thus get for myself energy experiences.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to based sex and sexuality as definitions of sex
of female pelvic area, female upper legs and lower stomach area, and to this
pictures connect positive and sexual energy charge and thus exist within and as
mind judgment of female body as positive, in perception and believe that this
is what I want, need and desire to touch, experience and feel as energy
experiences within me through touches of female body and thus use and abuse
female for getting the energy experiences for myself.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself as starting point of sex and sexuality as energy
experiences within me and my penis as connection of sexual energy towards
female body, legs, vagina, belly and connect this picture to my penis as energy
experience between myself and picture I saw and thus think and believe that
this is sex and sexual energy and that this experience is that what I need,
want and desire explore, experience and get for myself.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to connect projections, ideas and believe about
female body and female legs, vagina as picture presentation in front of me and
thus charge this picture with positive and sexual energy charge and exist within
and as mind separation from female body, as picture definition within my mind.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself too based sex and sexuality of myself on picture
presentation of female body and thus exist in and as mind design of picture and
relationship created towards this picture.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to separate myself from female body through
picture presentation of female body and think and believe that I am separated
from female and thus desire to be with female, experience female body and thus
exist as mind separation from female and myself, instead of see female as one
and equal with me as awareness as life.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that females keep their
vaginas hidden and thus create within me desire to want to get that what is
hidden and experience this what is hidden, to touch and uncover.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to desire to want to touch female as a point of
wanting to achieve that what I perceived females keep hidden and through this
create within me the desire, want and need to explore this, and create within me
energy experiences of this part of female body.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to connect to touches of my hands, lips, fingers,
penis energy charge, and charge this with positive energy and thus want and
desire to experience this energy within me and exist as mind slave as polarity
design of positive / negative.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to perceive touching and exploring of female
body as a goal and achievement and if this is done create within and as me the energy
experience of satisfaction and thus separate myself from satisfaction, instead
of be satisfied with myself as who I am here as physical body.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to perceive exploring of female body as fulfillment,
and thus separate myself from fulfillment, instead of fulfill myself in and as
breath, as physical being which is here.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to define satisfaction and fulfillment through
sex and sexuality as definition about sex as what sex should be based on
picture presentations ideas, believe and energy experiences connected to this,
instead of fulfill myself and satisfy myself in completion of me as who I am as
physical here.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that it is hard to achieve
to explore female body that I have, need or want to achieve this as sexual
desire of energy experiences.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to hope that female will give me permission to
explore her body and at the same time fear that I will not get this permission
and thus exist as mind friction and mind design of hope and fear and through
this create within and as me anxiety as energy experience.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that if female do not give
me permission to explore her body thus I am not good enough and not worthy and
thus exist as mind design of polarity as more / less, instead of give myself permission
to explore my body as myself and thus fulfill myself and satisfy myself though
exploring me.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to never give myself permission to explore myself
as physical body.
I forgive to myself that I have not
accepted and allowed to myself to enjoy my body, to explore my body, to fulfill
myself and satisfy myself.
I forgive to myself that I have not
accepted and allowed to myself to be intimate with my physical body and do not
see each part of my body equally as equality of physical as who I really am.
I forgive to myself that I have
not accepted and allowed to myself to like and enjoy my body and express myself
as physical as breath.
I
forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to separate female
body into parts and section and connect to each section and each part different
value and different energy charge as positive and thus exist as inequality of
me and myself as physical body, and by this perceive my body as unequal, where I
separated parts of my body and gave different value and different attention to myself as my physical body and thus exist within
and as mind as inequality, instead of see myself as one, as completion, as fulfillment,
as satisfaction as one and equal as physical as who I really am.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to create within me the friction because of
unequal perception of female body and my body, where I gave highest energy
charge towards female vagina, buttocks, legs, breast, neck, lips and ears and
towards myself as penis, buttocks, belly, neck lips and ears and see this parts
of female and my body as more than other parts of this bodies and thus exist
within and as mind design of polarity as more / less and by this generate
energy for the mind and exist as mind slave.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to participate on mind design of more / less and
thus gave permission to the mind to generate energy through me existing as two
polarities as more / less.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to perceive myself as superior when I get
permission to explore female body and inferior if not and thus exist as mind
polarity design of inferiority / superiority.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to create relationship between myself and female
based on desire for sex and desire to explore her body, instead of see myself as
one and her also and each other as equal to each other in oneness and equality
as breath.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to rank myself based on measurement of how far I
get with female with exploring her body and what are the points she allowed to
myself to do with her body and based on this gave myself value, as more I get
thus more value I have, and less I get thus less value I have and by this exist
as mind design of polarity as more / less where I accepted to myself to live
the desires, projections, ideas and believes about sex, sexuality and what sex
between male and female should be as picture presentation in my mind and energy
connection towards female body and to the touches of female body towards myself
and towards her body, where by this touches I generated sexual energy because
of my existence in separation from the female body as mind design.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to perceive sex with female as a goal, as achievement
which makes me male, instead of se and realize that I do not have to achieve
anything in regards of female body and that I am male expression as physical
here as physical design of my body.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to forget to express myself as sex and what is
real expression of me as sex as physical body as expression of me as physical
here, because I live all my life projection’s, ideas, believes about sex and
what sex should be, as pictures and energies.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to create within and as me characters of approaching
of female based on fear, sort females because of her bodies and thus shape,
mold myself and my behaviors according this, instead of be the same each moment
I am here.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to see sex as a goal and getting sex as a prize
and thus see myself as a winner if I have sex with female and loser if not and
thus exist as mind design of competition, where I connected this into getting sex
or not.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself shape and mold myself as the approach characters
towards females, based on fear where fear have been perceived as love and
separation of myself from female and thus perceiving female as not myself and
not equal to myself, where based on amount of fear generated towards female I
shaped my approach and my speech and utilized the characters for getting to the
point of achieve the “goal” and achieve the prize therefore to be a “winner” as
the one who get to a point of that which I perceived within me as highest
“prize” and “goal” as getting the permission from female to explore her body to a point of being able to
explore, experience the touches of female pelvic area with anything I am able
to, as fingers, penis, lips, tongue where different energy play outs took place
and by this create the friction as superior / inferior, more / less, like / do
not like and thus exist as mind designs and mind slave of energy as energy
addict.
Thanks,
Juraj
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