Day 130 : Fear of experiencing nothing

                I realized interesting point, this is like being scared, or frightened if I do not experience nothing, thus this is like wanting to experience something thus create within and as me frightening that I experience nothing and how come nothing is within me, thus by creating this experience I can again experience something, which is energy movement as fear.

                By paradox, I am stopping energy experiences, releasing myself from this experiences and when I get to a point where I experiences nothing, thus I became scared or frighten and thus from this want to experience something, but this, is simply separation.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to want to experience something within and as me and thus from this create the desire of want to experience something and thus became scared and frightened of myself not experiencing anything within and as me, to be able again experience something, instead of see and realize that this is just game of the mind to take me always back to energy experiences within and as me and make me trust to this experiences and believe to this experiences that it is me experiencing me, instead of see and realize, each moment consistently that anything of energy movements within and as me is always of the mind and thus not me, because I separated from myself.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to do not stand clear and stable within and as breath when I experience nothing within and as be but only breathing, as an attempt and desire to want to experiences something.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I am wrong or that I am not ok when I do not experience anything within me, but me just breathing.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I have to, that I must experience anything within me.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to desire to express myself instead of doing so.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think that do not experiencing energy movements within me is not ok and that I am not ok when I do not experience energy within me.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to create within and as me fear that what if I will never experience anything if I do not experience energy movements for a while and thus by this create within me energy as fear of not experiencing myself.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to do not see and realize that each moment I breathe thus I am with me here and that is all I am, me as breath.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to want to experience something more than me breath because of living my life on and as energy experiences of the mind.

                I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think and desire to experience more than myself, more than who I really am as breath as me, and by this separate myself from myself and create friction within and as me as desire to experience me, instead of breathe here each moment.

Thanks, Juraj