Saturday, July 7, 2012

Day 13 : Silence


                Mind likes to go rampant, mind likes tons of thoughts, projections, ideas, believes. Mind likes it as from this mind generates energy to sustain itself, to still have power and to still direct. Mind needs energy.

                Mind likes to show weaknesses and very likely use it for ones fall, but this can be used in process of one to stand up and to see why one fall, it is like opportunity to see it and thus direct and clear oneself in the point one fall.

                I liked to follow the mind in the journey’s which mind showed me, I liked to participate on speculations, how maybe possibly things are, how this or that possibly can work, what is that or this, it is actually funny as all of that are just explanations of mind and interpretations of reality within and without, and interestingly anyway through mind one will never understand reality, as mind is from reality disconnected.

                I used to fight with my mind, and after all I realized that fuck mind is supporting me when and why I am fucked, thus I started to use everything within my mind as opportunities to clear myself, to forgive myself and let it go, as day by day I realize and see how the mind is a trap, trap for life to do not live.

                I can’t fight with that what I have became, as I become the mind but that do not means that who I really am is mind. Not at all.

                The more I silence my mind, the more I stop the thoughts and release myself from energetic charges and connections and relationships I created towards my mind, the more I stop separation within me and the judgments of myself, interestingly, life became more and more simple and clear.

                I realize, that real silence will took place within me in the very moment last thought and last energy connection I’ll release, and what will remain is me in silence of me.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to try to fight with my mind and thus try to fight with myself.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to step out from silence of me into a mind and hear the thoughts mind speaks.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to do not see and realize that who I really am is silence of me where no words of the mind are here.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to do not see and realize that to be here is in the physical as physical as that what is here at moment.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to do not see and realize that to be here is to be with physical in silence of me.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to to step into a mind and participate in mind on the past and future and now, instead of realizing that mind is never here.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to trust to my mind as explanations and believes and ideas about physical reality, instead of realizing that all of that are just information and knowledge I learn during my lifetime and thru this very acceptance of information about reality I separate myself from reality and from what is here.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to deceive myself with explanations and ideas about myself and about reality and thus separate myself from myself.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to do not see and realize that real silence is presence of me here within and as reality as who I really am without any thoughts within my mind/head.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to do not see and realize that any word I hear in my head is my mind.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to myself to fear the silence of me and to fear how I direct myself when I am silence of me as who I really am.

I commit myself to investigate each thought, each word mind speaks within me and forgive those thought and words and remain silent as silence as me.

Thanks, Juraj


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