Years ago, when I was in stage
of copying each bullshit into me, I saw the story of a woman owning a family
company, where her right hand for financial operations was the most loyal man
she could have in her presence, and thus helping her patiently with everything
she dealt with, standing by her side while facing the circumstances of her
life.
This was a story in tv, and I was
looking upon this male in this story, how he was able to support her in
everything over a years, and she was overlooking his whole this period. The
memory of his standing nearby her arm seat while she making the decision start
to flash through my mind last few days. Within this story, he was fallen into a
love towards her, and she was over many years dating, flirting, living with
different males, while about 20 years she realized who is supporting her whole
this period, where she fall into a love towards him after this stage.
In this story, I copied several
point into me, and I defined myself according this story, and thus I created in
me several relationships, perceptions and ideas about love, support, and living
between male and female. It is interesting, how tv, as the stories, or books
support us to fall into a deceptive perception about ourselves and our lives.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to create the idea and believe about love,
support and living between male and female through pictures of the mind as male
standing by side of woman and supporting her through her life while waiting on
her to realize that he loves her and waiting for her to realize that he is
fallen in love to her and thus start to perceive him as a victim and thus
looking upon him of his ability to stand by her and to be able to support her
for so long time and wait on her for so long time and thus start to perceive love
as waiting on someone to realize the fuckup of oneself and perceive the love as
waiting on someone.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to live within, in and as a memory of time line
of a male waiting on female to recognize his support and his assistance towards
her and patiently solving with her point by points and living for her and thus I
forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to perceive love
as living for someone and perceive this as to be a victim or to sacrifice my
life for someone, instead of see and realize that I live my life, that I live
for myself here, that I support myself her and through supporting myself I am
able to support others as myself , in equality and oneness of me.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to define myself into and as idea of love and
living between male and female as that male is waiting for female and living
for her, sacrificing his life for her and accepting and allowing each bullshit
of her and patiently waiting on her to realize who he is in front of her and
thus create within me the believe that I have to sacrifice myself for some
women, that I have patiently accept and allow everything she do and support her
and assist her while wait on her to see me, instead of see myself here,
recognize myself here and support myself here and through this support and
assist others to see and realize what we accepted and allowed for ourselves to
live as a system of the mind, as a pre programmed life experiences while we
wait here on earth.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that love is about waiting
on woman while being fallen in love and that love is ability to support female
no matter what and stand by her no matter what, instead of see and realize that
love is equality, as me equal to me and me equal to others and see myself equal
to others and others equal to me and by this see and realize that love is not
of the feeling or ideas and believes but about of living in equality of me,
seeing equal me to others, where time is irrelevant as equality is who I really
am as life towards myself and towards others, as life is equal in everything within
existence.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to see myself as a victim and as a sacrificing
myself while supporting others and especially women instead of see myself equal
to them and them equal to myself in seeing and realization that support and
assistance of others is about solving what is her, as our acceptances and allowances
of living in and as mind system and thus supporting myself to see and realize
what is being accepted to live as a system and thus give myself and others equally
the opportunity to realize what it is what directs our and through this be able
to take responsibility for ourselves and direct our lives.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to think and believe that I have to sacrifice myself
to others and sacrifice myself for a woman and live for her, instead of see and
realize that this is just memory or the mind as definition, idea and believe
what love, living between male and female is or should be, and thus see and
realize that love is nothing of pictures, ideas, believes, perception nor any system
and component of the mind but equality as me standing and living as equal to
others, and seeing others as equals to myself.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to do not see and realize that real love is
equality of me, where within me each part of me is considered equally and thus
nothing of me is left behind or not considered, and thus nothing of me is
sacrificing for myself or making a victim of myself for myself, because I am
equal here as I am.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to see love as sacrificing oneself for other,
instead of see and realize that love is about support, assistance and considering
everyone equally where love is equality of myself as myself and thus see myself
equal to everything which exist in me, as me as breath of life here.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to perceive myself and think and believe of
myself that I have to sacrifice for woman and support her and assist her as
sacrificing myself to her, instead of see support and assistance as me giving
opportunity to realize what I accepted and allowed to myself and thus give
opportunity to see and realize for others what has been accepted and allowed to
live as deception of ourselves and deception between each other.
I forgive to myself that I have
accepted and allowed to myself to deceive myself with idea, perception and
believe that sacrificing for other and sacrificing myself for a woman is true
love, instead of see and realize that love has nothing to do with and component
of the mind, as perceptions, ideas nor believes, but love is expression of me
as me where each part of me is considered equally.
Thanks,
Juraj
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