The truth of me in darkness of
me as darkness of me is evil and this evil has been hidden in front of me, yet
many times this evil I had right in front of my eyes and I do not realized it
is me and the evil of me I am looking on.
I was not able to see this evil
what I am when I looked through the eyes and through the light, as light
provided me the illusion of separation and thus believe I am not seeing myself.
But I can’t deny what I see in
me, as me when I see into me, the truth of me I wanted to not see and there was
a moments I could realize what was part of me but I denied. But I can’t now and
I can’t anymore here.
Many years ago, I faced the
point I stood up within and as me and I changed my life completely, within one
decision, within one moment, I decided to stood up, where only me was present,
and where only I faced the point I accepted and allowed, and I stood and I stopped
myself. I was aware that within this decision I changed everything, yet I was
not able to see consequences, I see those consequences here and only thanks to
my standing up I am here and only thanks to that decision I am now writing
here, because of me able to stand up.
Thus I realized, that I am able
to stand up each point of evil which is part of me, as the first time I did was
13 years ago. And this evil of me, the brutality, bestiality, violence and misery
showed me the relationship I created within me, to me, towards me, as me. Hidden
in darkness of me, the possessions and demons waiting how and where could take
over of me and thus me waiting how I could generate sufficient energy for
myself, by the acts I described above. I was surprised and also not surprised
when I saw this points in me, because I was aware many years something like
this is the part of me, but I never did anymore, as within my standing I decided
to simply stand that point and I stood till here.
There was a point of me wanting
to bound myself to myself, to enslave myself, by the hands and the legs, to
show and reveal that only to me I will belong, but this showed me how I separated
myself from myself and thus how I deluded myself. And I did because of light
and looking through the light because I wanted to see me in and through the
light, I deceived myself, as to see in darkness of me I do not require the
light as the darkness is what and who I am.
Thus I see and realize what I accepted
and allowed to myself to exist as towards myself, and thus I simply decided to
stand up. That’s all.
The first time I stood up, the
very first time I decided to stop, I realized that by this I gave myself the
life and that I allowed myself to live here, thus this implies, that every
point I am able to stand up and stand eternally, thus by this I am giving
myself the life equally eternal.
This simply means, that by standing
the points for myself and as myself as all, that by ability to take each point
and stand up for this point, which I proved myself I am able to, that by taking
everything which is required to stand up for, thus by this I will give myself
the eternal life.
By seeing the evil of me, and
standing up from this evil and do not accept and allow this evil anymore, means
simply give life and start to live.
See the evil you are, and live.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think,
believe and define seeing as looking through the light and see the light and
see myself through the light, instead of see and realize that mind looks as
information and knowledge but I do not need and require light or information or
knowledge to see myself, to see into me as who I am, what I became and why I exist
the way I exist.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to believe
that to see me I require light, instead of see and realize what and who I am as
darkness of me as evil I became.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to hide
myself in the light in believe that by the light I will be invisible and thus I
will not have to see into me, instead of realize that the light will cease to
exist and thus I will have to see me, into me, what I have became.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to hide the
evil of me in the light as the light provide me the ability to create the false
façade of me, the false picture of me, in believe that what is as the dark of
me will not bee seen.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself define the
light as good and dark as bad and thus exist in and as polarity of the mind as
light and dark and thus move myself between light and dark within the hope and
believe that light will gave me the ability to cover the evil of me I exist as
dark.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself fear to
see into me directly as darkness of me as who I am and what I became and why.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think
and believe that be fearing to see the darkness of me as me I will not have to
face me and see into me as using fear as protecting mechanism in front of
myself to not see me.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to
separate myself from myself and thus want and desire to enslave myself by the
hands and by the ankles of legs to make myself belong only to me, not seeing
and realizing that I am already here as all as me as wherever I am thus I am,
thus I do not desire to enslave me anymore, to bound me or trap myself as I am
here.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to let
myself die as separation myself form myself because of wanting and desiring
myself to enslave me and trap me into a bondage.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to fear my
own evil and to fear to see the evil as life of me, what I became and why.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself create the
relationship towards me as violence, bestiality and enslavement of myself into
traps of the mind as energy experiences I generated for myself because of
believe that this energy experiences are real experiences of me, thus living in and as believe that I need this
energy for myself and that I require this energy and thus accept and allow to
manipulate me, abuse me, desire to enslave me, to make friction as good and bad
and by this generate energy for myself.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to look on
violence towards me and think and believe that this is good because it provides
me the energy I wanted for myself, and thus live in the enslavement of me as
separation of myself through violence of me as living zombie for energy.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to fear to
embrace the evil as evilness of me as darkness of me because of judgment of
myself as bad, instead of see and realize that I existed always as darkness of
me thus I embrace myself as darkness of me and I accept and allow myself to see
everything I exist and consist of as darkness of evil as me as I do not fear to
see me anymore and I do not allow myself to judge myself for what who I became,
as I see and realize that judgment and fear of myself blind me and do not allow
me to live thus I stop the fear of myself.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to create
the relationship towards me as polarity as good/bad and superior/inferior and
nice/ugly not seeing that all of this are my own made up illusions of the mind
of myself.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think
and believe that I cannot stand up each single point for myself alone and as
all and stand up for myself as life and live because of believe that I am too
weak and unable to stand up, instead of see and realize that I proved to myself
that I am able to stand up within and as me, for myself alone and thus for all
and thus do not allow to blind myself anymore.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to see
myself as a separated from myself and thus from all, instead of realize that I made
up this illusion of separation in and as my mind and thus fall into a believe
that I am separated from myself.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to trap
myself through the light into a believe that I need to see me, that I desire to
see me, that I want to see me, that I have to look for me and search what and
who I am, instead of realize and see that I am already here as I always was as existence
of physical, as breath of life, as darkness of me in silence of me as who I am.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to trap
myself into a believe that what I see through my eyes as reflection of light is
not me and thus start to desire to be with me and see me.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to want to
enslave myself because of my fear and separation from myself and thus fear that
I will be not with myself any more.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to create
the enslavement of myself as a fear of not being with me.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself create the
enslavement of me as desire to have power over me, instead of realize and see
that I am the power of me as breath of life, that I am the real power of myself
as existence as physical, that I am real direction of me thus I do not require
to have power, as I am the power.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself create the
enslavement as starting point of wanting and desiring to be the one, to be the
one in charge and in power because I separated myself from myself, not realize
and see that I wanted and desired to be that what I already am, as one as all
here, and that I wanted to direct myself through illusion of power over me
because I separated from myself, instead of direct myself as one as all as who I
really am.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to create
the enslavement as desire to bound myself to myself to be with myself forever,
not seeing and realizing that I did because I separated myself from myself and
thus trapped myself that I have to somehow bound myself back to me, instead of
stand up for myself as one as all as who I really am here, as existence of
life.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to create
the enslavement as a separation from myself as a starting point of wanting to
be a dictator, not seeing that I wanted and desired to dictate to myself what
and who I am, what and how I should live, instead of live me, express me and
voice me as a living being as a living word.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself create the
enslavement of me as a punishment of myself for the not getting to myself what I
desired and want, not realize and see for myself that by this I wanted to
punish myself for that what I refused to give to myself because I separated
from myself.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself create the
punishment of myself and enslavement of myself because of wanting and desiring
to get attention, acceptance, freedom, respect and dignity from myself, not realizing
and seeing that I wanted and desired this because I separated myself form
myself and thus I was unable to give myself and accept myself, instead of
realize that by this I was unable to give myself the attention, acceptance,
freedom respect and dignity because I separated myself from myself.
Thanks,
Juraj
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