What is tiredness, and what
means to be tired? When tiredness is real? I noticed interesting point, at the beginning
of my process, after applying self-forgiveness I became sometimes so tired,
that I was not able to function and thus I had to go to bed, to sleep just for
a while, as tiredness experienced was immense.
Over time, this tiredness became
les and les and eventually I was able to function fresh all day, I applied SF
on tiredness so far many times. Each time this tiredness disappeared and I continued
during my days.
As I realized, real physical
tiredness I always experience within and as my body, in muscles, when I see
that my body is really tired and need rest. The second type of tiredness, I experience
within my head region, it is just sense of being tired, this sense come often
after stopping some point, some energies within me, of after applying SF, just
question is, why this tiredness come?
Sometimes, this tiredness was within
me as a protection mechanism of not wanting to face the reality, not wanting to
face me, thus energy created and sense of being tired, to rather escape and not
have to do what I had to, most of time when I had to accomplish something, and I
do not wanted, or I do not wanted to bother myself with participation on
specific tasks, thus rather I allowed tiredness to emerge within me and thus go
to bed.
Or after applying SF, experience
like removed energy and living on that energy, and thus have nothing within me
what could move me, instead of taking responsibility and move myself without
this energy. Interesting scenarios.
Anyway, it is always, to be
directed by energy, or direct self as self movement. To move, be here and enjoy
the presence without necessity of being directed by anything and anyone. That’s
quite journey to accomplish into perfection.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to think
and believe that tiredness exist, that it is real experience of me, instead of
realizing that tiredness as experience within and as my body, in head, as
energy is just of the mind, created and generated by me as a point of not
wanting to face me, to participate on that what is required to be done, as my
resistance, as a point of boredom, as a point of energy requirement of being
directed by energy and live on and as energy, instead of standing up as who I am,
instead of taking responsibility for myself and my world and people within my
world and move myself ,express myself, voice myself and speak myself within and
as breath ,as expression of me as living word.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself the
tiredness to exist within and as me as a energy generated and allowed by me as
mind as a point of not have to accomplish certain tasks I have to, as a point
of wanting to rest and have a time for myself and wanting to have energy within
me as a point of wanting to be directed by energy instead of standing up, and
do not accept and allow the energy as tiredness to move me and direct me and my
world, my speech and my life.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself to became
addicted on energy and thus require always experience some energy, and even
when this energy is not experienced by any means and any point here, thus
create the energy as tiredness to have a point of abdicating my self responsibility
and responsibility for my life and my world and not having to direct myself, to
move myself but rather submit myself into and as mind as energy to move me and
direct me.
I forgive to myself that I have accepted and allowed to myself the existence
of energy as tiredness to exist within and as me as a point of separation from
energy to have a platform for experiencing this energy in believing that this
experience is real experience of me as myself as who I am, instead of seeing
and realizing that always I accept and allow to the experience of energy in
separation from myself, thus I am supporting the separation within and as the
world in me and outside of me, that I am supporting the existence of tiredness
as energy movement and direction of energy, that within this I am supporting
the abdication of one’s life and taking responsibility for one’s life, instead
of taking self responsibility, to stand up within and as me as who I am here as
breath, to stand up and show as a living example of living word that it is possible
to stand up and take self responsibility for life and oneself within this
world, to direct myself without energy requirements and not accepting and
allowing to be directed by energy.
Thanks,
Juraj
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